Agam Berger Reflects on Captivity "It Was Hard Reading That Our Lives Might Not Be Worth It"

Freed Israeli hostage Agam Berger opened up about the emotional turmoil she experienced while in Gaza captivity, sharing how hearing public debates about the cost of the hostage deal impacted her. Speaking to Israel's public broadcaster KAN on Tuesday, Berger described the difficulty of grappling with the notion that her life might not be "worth enough."

"It's not anyone's fault that they were kidnapped; people need to know that they are fighting for us," said Berger, who was taken from the Nahal Oz base on October 7, 2023. "It's like saying that our lives aren't worth enough."

At the same time, messages of hope filtered through. "We heard people say that Israel was able to pay the price of the deal, and it gave us strength," she noted.

Berger also shared the harsh reality of captivity, revealing that after Operation Arnon in June, which saw the rescue of hostages Noa Argamani, Shlomi Ziv, Almog Meir Jan, and Andrey Kozlov, her captors confiscated the radio from her and fellow IDF observer Liri Albag. “The captors were always anxious, and after the rescue, it worsened,” she said.

In January, Berger received two prayer books and a Maariv newspaper, which she said helped her find answers to some of the lingering questions surrounding the October 7 massacre.

Her interactions with her captors varied. "There were some who were with us for a long time, but then they were replaced. It depended a lot on the time period. Even those who treated us well would argue with us over small things and reprimand us," she recounted.

Despite everything, Berger tried to hold onto hope. "I always tried to believe that in the end, we would be released," she said. However, when she was not freed in time for her brother’s bar mitzvah, "it was hard."

After Albag and three other IDF observers were released on January 25, Berger remained alone in captivity. She learned of her own release just two days before it happened. "I told myself that I was here alone after a year and a half. I asked myself, 'Is there a ceasefire? Am I going home?' I believed it, but it was a surprise to hear that in two days, I’d be home it felt strange. I thought it would take another month," she recalled.

The morning of her release, Berger was dressed in a hijab over her IDF uniform. "They drove me around for two hours, gave me a 'gift,' and asked me to record thank-you videos for them. At that moment, I couldn’t tell them the truth to their faces. I did what I could, and I didn’t care as long as I was freed."

Berger also addressed the importance of an October 7 probe. "It's important that everything is investigated, not just for me, but for those who gave their lives that day and to ensure that those who need to be held accountable are held accountable."

Her story is a testament to the strength and resilience of those who have endured captivity and a powerful reminder of the ongoing fight to bring all hostages home.

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